Tips For Guys

“My whole life, I’ve been preparing to be a good wife. I want a good husband. Do you know what it takes to make a good marriage?” (Rachel, Come What May)

In Christian circles, girls constantly talk about how hard it is to wait patiently for their Prince Charming to come. We talk about the struggles of maintaining emotional purity, of being content and all other such topics. This is good for us, and as hard as it sometimes is on our little hearts, as females, we enjoy talking about relationship related things with our fellow girlfriends. It’s how God made us.
But today, my words are for the guys.
We girls sometimes don’t realize how tough gentlemen have it. They have to wade through the sea of Christian girls, hoping to find one that meets their own criteria and isn’t an affected little goose. And to put it simply, guys don’t think about relationships in the same way that girls do. Oh, sure, they think about it. They just are not wired to think about romance 24/7 like girls are. That’s not a bad thing…it’s just how God made them!
With things being the way they are, guys need help sometimes when it comes to finding themselves a girl. I have three brothers…I know. There are some things that guys excel at when it comes to relationships (usually initiating them in the first place). And then there are some things that they just don’t think about. Again, I’m not saying that’s a bad thing! It’s how they are wired! But I think it would help if guys knew better what girls wanted and what was going on in their heads.
Therefore, I’ve compiled a little list of some things that I have learned (most recently, in fact) that guys should know when it comes to courting.
Please note this is all my opinion. I can’t speak for other girls. They may not see these things as important. But I wager there’s a fair amount of girls that do hold these things with high regard. And even if they aren’t crucial things, they will definitely score points.
So without further ado…

Hannah’s Tips for Guys

~Serve. Do for your girl even when you have no assurance that she is your girl.
~Talk. Ask. And Listen!
~Protect her heart. Say nothing and act in no way that would cause her to stumble.
~Until you are in a committed and official relationship, DO NOT monopolize her company or her conversation. She is not yet yours…don’t treat her as such.
~Learn to dance and watch at least one Austen film. It scores points big time. ;)
~Be real and honest. Don’t hold back your “long stories”, your past, your present or your future. Tell her where you’ve been in life and where you want to go. Don’t change you dreams to try to impress her, because if you are phony before marriage, that won’t change after the wedding.
~Respect her dad. Don’t try to get around him. He has raised her, cared for her and loved her since her first breath. You want to step in and take over his treasure. Give him the respect he deserves and in turn you will be respecting her.
~There is fine line you must tread by with caution in your pursuit of a young lady. Strive to win her, but do not demand that she be won. Actively and persistently pursue her, but do so patiently and be prepared to wait quietly for her.
~And again I will say, until she is officially yours, be careful how much of her company and conversation you occupy, for if you monopolize her, you are putting her in situations that may hurt her and make her uncomfortable by having to explain your over abundant presence to her friends and family. Be a friend but keep your distance.

"Fiat Justicia - Et Pereat Mundas.

Do the Right thing - Come what may."

(screenshots from the movie Come What May by Advent Film Group)



  1. This a lovely post and your points/suggestions for the guys are so true! Especially true is the warning against monopolizing a girl's time. We young ladies set our affections on people very quickly so it's important that if a guy doesn't mean business he should back off a bit and be respectful of a girl heart and her time. I also love what you said about fathers and daughters, this is a special relationship that a young man must honor. Thank you for this insightful post, it was helpful and encouraging to me and I hope it reaches some of those Christian young men out there too!

    God Bless,
    Miss Laurie
    Old-Fashioned Charm

    P.S. I've never seen Come What May, it looks interesting.

  2. Amen! Thank-you for this post. :) The tips you offered are spot-on, and "Come What May" offers an excellent viewpoint on that subject as well!


  3. Thanks for posting that! The tips are very insightful! I shall try very hard to get them all down, just in case the time comes for me to apply them.

    Also, I really like Come What May, and I got to work on Advent Film Group's latest movie, Alone Yet Not Alone. Look for it next year. (I have a cameo in it!) Victoria Emmons, the girl who played Rachel, is in the new film too.


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