Why are the simplest things so difficult?
When will men and women take their places? Men need to stand up and be the wild warriors God made then to be. Women need to step back and let their men be men, and be happy riding shotgun in the adventure instead of driving.
I see so many men held handicapped by their wives and mothers. It is actually quite sickening and disheartening. A friend of mine always stated in despair, “There are no good men! Where are the strong Christian leaders?” I always disagreed with that statement, saying that they were out there somewhere. But seeing what I see makes me wonder. Where are they?
Actually, I know where they are. They are in every man I see. Young and old, they are all there. Deep in their hearts, they are strong leaders and wild warriors. They long to fight the battles, live the adventures and rescue the beauties. The problem is…they have wives and mothers.
So, simply put: Wife, follow your husband and let him be the wild one he longs to be. Mother, quit hanging onto and pushing your son around, and let him grow up and be a man!
You have no right to be frustrated with your men because they will not lead or choose for themselves, because you are holding them back. Bite your tongue. Bite it till it falls off if you have to. Only when you, wife and mother, learn to shut up and be content with being a woman will your husband and your son stand up and be the Men they were meant to be.
“There is a strength in you…I see it.” (William Wallace to Robert Bruce in Braveheart)
Am I frustrated? Yes, I am. I’m sorry if this sounds harsh, but every once in a while, someone has to quit dodging the truth and say what needs to be said. And maybe I should have said it a long time ago, but often I don’t see a way to write things till it hits really close to home. Or in this case, hits home enough to sucker punch me right in the heart.
I am not perfect. I’ll be the first to tell you that. Some people may say I sound like a total hypocrite talking about the place of women and men, when here I’m running a ministry. Yeah, I’m being a leader. Well, you can think what you want. I will make no lame excuses about doing God’s work or whatever. I did what I saw needed to be done. I do not like leading. But sometimes I have to, because no one else will.
On another note (yes, I’m still venting), what about love and respect? The book “For Young Women Only” by Lisa Rice and Shaunti Feldhaun states that the majority of men would rather be respected than loved, and women would rather be loved than respected. Well, over the past year, I’ve learned what its like to be loved and NOT respected, and I can tell you this…I would rather be respected. It goes hand in hand, really. Respecting me proves that you love me, because you cannot truly love me without respecting me.
You can put on whatever show you want, you can say tons about loving me…but if you cannot respect the simplest things I ask, then you might as well cut out my heart, throw it in the dirt and step on it.
Its not that hard. I really don’t make things that difficult! And if for some reason you are unsure about how I feel about something, ASK ME in a way that you know is right! Instead of guessing, ask! And don’t do it if you think it might not be right. Nothing is so important that you have to step all over me in order to accomplish it.
I understand if you don’t agree. I don’t expect people to agree with me. Its wonderful when they do, but I can’t make anyone agree with me. But worse than not agreeing with me is saying that they do when they really don’t.
Why??! Why do people continue to schmooze along, just mamby-pamby agreeing with everything I say just to get on my good side? I’d respect people more if they stood up for themselves and were strong in their own convictions instead of always trying to weasel around mine.
Truth has no agenda.
I am not a hateful person. It takes a lot for me to really despise a person. My love for people is deep and forgiving, and I’ll be the first person to hand out second chances…and third chances. My good opinion once given is not easily taken away, but as Mr. Darcy says, “My good opinion once lost is lost forever.” Prove you are worthy of a second chance, and I will give it. But if you cannot stand strong and respect me, and if you cannot deeply and honestly agree, then don’t go hurting me again.
I am not saying that I will not be friends with people that disagree with me. Oh, gosh, no…several of my very best friends hold views quite different from me. But the thing is that they aren’t afraid to say it. My friend Marcos and I have a running joke that we disagree on everything but Calvinism! I’m not afraid to disagree with people. Such is life…we are all individuals, and that’s how God created us. But I cannot bear it when a person makes themselves out to be something they are not just to get on my good side.
Life holds so much good. God has given a world so infinitely beautiful. Wouldn’t it be a shame to waste it?
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Anne smiled and said, "My idea of good company, Mr. Elliot, is the company of clever, well-informed people, who have a great deal of conversation; that is what I call good company." "You are mistaken," said he gently, "that is not good company, that is the best..."
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-Jane Austen,
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ReplyDeleteokay, now your Glorious makes more sense :) I didn't see this post until after I read Glorious. I agree about the Guys being guys & we as women letting them lead & hanging on :)and I also agree that we can disagree as long as we're loving & respectful about it. You & I both know that it can be done ;) And I also know that you can forgive & give second chances.
ReplyDeleteI was asked once if "I'd rather be loved or respected?". I said "Respected" & Aunt B. said "Figures :P" so I know what you mean about respect :)
It's important to be honest & real with ourselves & each other :)